Have you ever felt like you are paying for someone else's mistakes or bad choices? I have. My daughter is. Her dad chose to do some pretty vile things and is in prison for 70ish years. Basically life.
Those outside the prison gates, his family, are left to pick up the pieces and carry on. We must soldier through the hurt and disillusionment. The fear, guilt, shame and questions. Our lives continue on knowing this man was not who he said he was, and has hurt many people.
His daughter is a big part of that. She is now growing up without him. At some point she will have to know the truth. When she is older she may want to go visit him. I will support her if she does and even go with her. I will support her if she does not.
Right now and for the rest of our lives we are paying for his choices. Our journey had changed greatly. Our family broke. It is up to me to model how to handle the change.
Thankfully I am not alone. I have the Bible and the Holy Spirit to help and guide. I have a support system in our community. I have a good family and we band together through trials.
It is all this and the example Christ gave on the cross that has shown me how much I need to forgive. Forgive my ex for what he did. Forgive him for the changes those choices forced upon me. Forgiveness is a huge part of life.
By letting go, and sometimes I have to re-let-go, I am able to be filled with the fruits of the spirit: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. I am able to move forward. It allows me to see my ex through the eyes of Christ. To pray for him and others in prison.
Those men and women are loved by our Savior. He hates the choices they made that led to their incarceration, but God doesn't want anyone to perish, to wind up in prison and then Hell. Prison for many can be a wake up call for the need for salvation. Pray for them.
This does not mean we then free them on this earth. Some people need prison so others can be protected.
Forgiveness is a tricky thing because it leads to a question of once we do forgive how much do we then trust that person? I have learned that the Holy Spirit will guide us and let us know if that person can be trusted or if we should still love and pray for them but be careful. Forgiveness is not forgetting.
Joy comes when we allow ourselves to forgive and not let the other person's choices mire us.
Those outside the prison gates, his family, are left to pick up the pieces and carry on. We must soldier through the hurt and disillusionment. The fear, guilt, shame and questions. Our lives continue on knowing this man was not who he said he was, and has hurt many people.
His daughter is a big part of that. She is now growing up without him. At some point she will have to know the truth. When she is older she may want to go visit him. I will support her if she does and even go with her. I will support her if she does not.
Right now and for the rest of our lives we are paying for his choices. Our journey had changed greatly. Our family broke. It is up to me to model how to handle the change.
Thankfully I am not alone. I have the Bible and the Holy Spirit to help and guide. I have a support system in our community. I have a good family and we band together through trials.
It is all this and the example Christ gave on the cross that has shown me how much I need to forgive. Forgive my ex for what he did. Forgive him for the changes those choices forced upon me. Forgiveness is a huge part of life.
By letting go, and sometimes I have to re-let-go, I am able to be filled with the fruits of the spirit: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. I am able to move forward. It allows me to see my ex through the eyes of Christ. To pray for him and others in prison.
Those men and women are loved by our Savior. He hates the choices they made that led to their incarceration, but God doesn't want anyone to perish, to wind up in prison and then Hell. Prison for many can be a wake up call for the need for salvation. Pray for them.
This does not mean we then free them on this earth. Some people need prison so others can be protected.
Forgiveness is a tricky thing because it leads to a question of once we do forgive how much do we then trust that person? I have learned that the Holy Spirit will guide us and let us know if that person can be trusted or if we should still love and pray for them but be careful. Forgiveness is not forgetting.
Joy comes when we allow ourselves to forgive and not let the other person's choices mire us.
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