Skip to main content

A Daddy

Last night as we were praying my Snowflake asked, "Jesus bring me a daddy please?" It is a prayer I have heard often and one that makes me want to weep.

She knows and will tell people that God is her Abba, her Father, but my sweet girl longs for a daddy.  She has a great Papa (my Dad) and an adopted Grandpa Gary. There are great male role models in her life, but she wants a dad.

That is something I haven't been able to provide for her.  I was almost engaged earlier but I realized that I was doing it for the wrong reasons and with the wrong man.

She will only get her deepest prayer if it is for the right reasons: 1. He loves Jesus 2. He loves me and Snowflake 3. God gives me peace.  With everything we have been through I have to approach this with my eyes wide open.

I want to find my mate.  I loved being married. Marriage is a great institution, but I will be careful and my husband will be a man of God.  It will be a good union.  So, Snowflake will have to be patient with Mommy and trust me as we both trust God with this desire.

Joy comes when we realize that while our prayers and desires may be godly God may tell us to wait and that is ok. In the meantime we can spend more time with Him and that is the best way to spend time!


Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

No Sleep & A Friend Who Gets it!

One of the battles Snowflake and I have fought over the last 4.5 years is with sleep. She started out life as the greatest sleeper in the history of baby sleep. Quickly she was sleeping for 4-5 hours at a time. When she was awake she was inquisitive, happy and fun. When she was asleep she was O-U-T, out! She could sleep in the bowling alley! I thought I had birthed the world's best sleeper. I did not deal with new mom exhaustion. I was blessed. AND THEN... Well it started when she was fourteen months old. When our life changed. People say that little humans are resilient, and they are, but they notice and respond to major life changes. They are human after all and trauma affects us all, age doesn't matter. The young, old and in between are all changed by traumatic events, and Snowflake, she has a background with trauma. It isn't easy to lose a parent at any age, when you are too young to understand why that parent vanished and then the other parent moves you to a brand ...
1 comment
Read more

Keeping it at His Feet

I love to pray.  I love to just talk to Jesus.  He really is my best friend.  It amazes me that He knows me, knows all my secrets, my failures, my inadequate times, my sins and He loves me. He truely loves me. He doesn't love me less than He did when I was younger and skinnier.  He knows what I need to work on but He won't love me more when I purge some sin struggles.  He loves me completely and fully right now. He pursued me. He was beaten, tortured, mocked and brutally killed for me! My name was on His heart when He obeyed the Father on that terrible day. I can never thank Him enough.  I can't get enough of Him. I just love talking to God, the one I can trust with all my tears, fears, doubts, worries and hopes. I am really good at taking things to Him.  One thing I am working on is leaving it there.  I tend to want to take back my fears, worries and doubts. I want to see the future so I know if He says "yes" to my hopes. My big prayer ...
Post a Comment
Read more

I Want Better

You tell me I'm a "Deplorable" because I support Capitalism. You tell me I am dumb and backward and anti-choice because I support adoption, abstinence and condoms. You call me heartless when I want secure borders. You ridicule and mock my religion that is based on love and forgiveness. You scream that I'm killing the globe when I throw away my trash. That is just fine. You say you want equal rights, so do I.  It is fine because I want more for my daughter. I want more than bread lines and government issued food. I want more for her than the guilt, cancer risks and infertility risks of abortion. I want more than allowing terrorists, rapists, drug dealers and child predators into my country (we have enough already). I want more for my daughter than a faith built on chaos and chance. I support a God who loves, forgives, guides and offers a joy filled eternity. I want a clean earth, I'm all for recycling, but I want more for my daughter than spending all of our prec...
Post a Comment
Read more