Snowflakes and Joy

I know, it should be obvious but let me state it anyway. I can't stop time. You can't stop time. Time stops for no one. Six years ago I gave birth to my sweet, stubborn, strong willed, smart, sassy, silly, creative and loving Snowflake. I know it has been six years, but it is hard to deal with. Together we have walked the path abandonment and betrayal. I lost my husband and she lost her daddy. We went from a family of 3 and trying for our 4th family member to a family of 2. We moved 2000 miles across the country and started life anew. We began to grieve our loss and grow into the new family and individuals that we were becoming. Life changed through pain but we chose not to be mired in the pain. It has been five years now. Five years of living. Five years of gaining perspective on all that precipitated the pain. Five years of growing. Five years of laughter. Five years of love. Five years of being a duo. Five years for me being a single mom. Motherhood is an amazing, ch...

I yell, I lose my temper, I don't always budget and follow it perfectly.  I need to shed 45 pounds.  Snowflake's lunch is not always a perfect balance of the food groups.  My fashion sense can best be described as "comfortable".  I don't always have long prayers or spend as much time in Scripture as I'd like.  Snowflake's baths are sometimes hurried and I forget to remind her to brush her teeth. I am far from perfect.  I feel at times like I am screwing up.  Especially when I hear from the school, "Your daughter got impatient & head butted a kid." Then, I remember all the snuggles and cuddles.  The "I love you more"s. The kind things she does for me and others.  She is not perfect.  She has my temper. She is quick to realize her errors and apologize.  It is ok for her to have bad days. They are natural.  It doesn't mean I am a parenting failure.  It is ok for me to have bad days.  Bad days are a sign of huma...

Being a single parent is not easy.  There is a reason God designed families to have 2 parents.  It is 24/7/365. You are always a parent.  1:30 am coughing fit and you are up taking care of it. You are still up at 2:37 am trying to coax the child back to sleep knowing that at 6:45 am the alarm clock will obnoxiously signal time for the new day to begin. Not to mention single parents carry the whole weight. Single parents can not "tag" out and let the other one handle it for a wee bit.  As a single parent with no child support that also means I am her only source of income.  Everything rests on my shoulders. I want to raise a child who grows into a woman of Biblical character.  While I am her sole parent I am not doing this alone.  The secret for single parents is to remember truth at 2:47 am.  Remember the tribe you have around you.  You have friends willing to help, and if you are so blessed you have family too. They may not be there in t...

Some days I feel like I am doing quite well.  My daughter is feeling good and well behaved. She listens and makes good choices.  Parenting is fun.   Then there are the days she hits and kicks and throws tantrums like she is trying to earn a gold medal in tantrums.  Those days I feel like I am failing at this mother game.   At school she is kind, helpful and wants to learn.  I guess that is a good barometer that maybe I'm doing some things right.   During the hard days I have to remind myself that she is 6. She is allowed to be a little kid.  She loves little kid things.   She is helpful and independent.  She is tall and likes to use her height to get into things. She is a typical kid.  She loves to be silly and tells horrible non funny jokes that crack her up and her laughter is infectious. She is 6.  Today is mostly a good day.  She chose her own outfit and dressed herself. She made ...

Our Thursday night was atypical.  Snowflake has no school on Friday so we had some fun.  It started with Snowflake choosing dinner.  She picked ice cream with crazy toppings and nachos. We ate in the living room while watching what was going to be her Easter gift, The Star.  After the credits we watched the special features abd danced together in the living room. Then as I was cleaning up Snowflake was supposed to go put on pjs and ended up asleep in the dead center of my bed, so I crashed on my recliner. It is now 2:15 am and she is asleep in my arms in the recliner. These days won't last forever.  I won't always be the one she wants to spend her evenings with.  Talk of ice cream toppings and stuffed animals will change to celebrities and boys.  She will continue to grow up.  That's good and natural.  It is the way of life if I am doing this parenting thing right.  I look forward to watching her grow up into a woman after God's own ...

I did not ever meet the man but my heart is sad today.  Sad for the world's loss of the grestest preacher of the 20th century. At age 99 Rev. Billy Graham has been called home to Heaven.  "Someday you will hear rumors of my death, but I will be more alive than ever.  I will just have moved on to my real home with Jesus." Billy Graham has made it home and I am sure that he heard the words he longed to hear (and that all should long to hear) from our Lord, "Well done my good and faithful servant. Welcome home!" Billy (if I may use his first name) was a good and faithful servant.  Due to his faith and obedience many souls were introduced to Christ and the kingdom expanded.  Many will be in Heaven and not suffering in Hell. Many have grown in their own faith and obedience.  Today and in the days to come we say goodbye to a public figure who lived 99 years and spent them serving and loving others, sacrificing time with his family to ensure that others hear...

A lot of folks here in these parts are not overly thrilled with the number of  snowflakes we have littering our... well our everywhere right now.  While I admit that it is rough on my joints (I say as my back is having spasms & my hands want to move to another body in a warmer climate and my head is pounding, oh the life of chronic pain is grand) I love the freezing water crystals. Yes it is cold and not fun to get stuck.  Yes it makes driving rough, but I can always warm up with tea and a blanket.  I can dig myself out and use snow tires.  In the summer I just melt.  The heat bothers me more than the cold . Besides look at how sparkly the snow is, think of the workout of sledding and shoveling.  Both are great forms of exercise.  Imagine the taste of crunchy bread dipped in hot soup on a cold and snowy day (here we don't have to imagine it! What a gift). Like all things, snow is a matter of perspective.  It is a matter of attitude....