Snowflakes and Joy

I want Snowflake to have amazing memories of Christmas. It is my favorite time of the year. I also want them to be Christ focused. A few years ago when the Elf on the Shelf craze hit I struggled. Do I get one or not? We don't do Santa (we watch the cartoons but she knows of Saint Nicholas and that Santa Clause is fake) but we get stocking stuffers.  It didn't make sense, so I didn't get the Elf on the Shelf. I was then given one. So I prayed about it. God gave me an idea! I could use the cute guy to go on a journey to discovering the true meaning of Christmas each year. So our elf Yates (my favorite poet) does just that.  Each night we learn about Jesus, why we have Christmas and how we share Christmas with others. He starts his journey the night of December 1st each year.  Stay tuned to see some of his adventures!                             2015: Reading Jesus' birth      ...

Prayer is one of my favorite activities.  To know that the Creator of the universe, the Lord of All, GOD is interested in my thoughts, dreams, hopes, fears, joys and problems is amazing! I am no one special to the world, but the Bible says that to HIM I am.  Just think, God ( yup the GOD, the 1 true GOD) thinks each of us are special and important. Let that sink in. Gives me goosebumps. Back to prayer. I love it. My prayers are not fancy.  It is just me pouring my jumbled thoughts out to my Best Friend, my Savior, my Lord. Last night (well this morning time wise) as I was praying for my daughter the matter of a dad came up.  This girl wants a dad in her life.  It is what she asks Jesus for in her prayers.  "Bring me a daddy, but not a naughty one like my 1st one, a one from you. " It breaks my heart and I am sure HIS too. To hear this precious child yearn for this important figure. I too yearn for not just a dad for my daughter but a spouse for me. So...

I have always thought it would be fun to visit a Hollywood set and have a bit part, just for the experience.  I love to write and plan to publish more books, but I don't want all the fame the Kardashians or others have. I want to be known as a woman of prayer, a loving mom, a modern day Proverbs 31 woman.  I want my life to be quiet but extraordinary. I don't need thrilling adventures to far away places.  I need tea/coffee dates with friends, a Bible study group where I can be authentic and accepted, a job where I can serve and help people, camping trips with my daughter.  Quiet memories made with family and friends. It is ok to want the big life, the thrills and the adventures. It is also ok to not want them. To love mercy, to act justly, to serve humbly, to forgive completely, to invest fully in others, to yearn to know Christ more and more, to develop grace and wisdom, to raise a daughter who loves Christ 110% that is my bucket list. It isn't fancy, it w...

I am sitting in my recliner under my cozy red and white snowflake electric throw blanket.  I have some tea steeping, the Statler Bros are singing and outside the wind is a blowing. It is Monday.  I am in the midst of fighting a bug and coping with my RA. So, a fairly normal Monday.  My Snowflake is back at school after being sick herself and then enjoying Thanksgiving. Speaking of Thanksgiving, it was a good one.  We (my parents, daughter and myself) joined others at church for our Thanksgiving feast.  After eating the Snowflake played with other kids (it mostly involved the very festive game of hitting each other with pool noodles). After all that fun there was a walk/scootering along one of the pathways in our beautiful country town.  I have much to be thankful for. On my social media page I spend November listing all that I am thankful for.  I realize that while my things are nice they are not what I am most thankful for.  It is th...

I am sorry I have been MIA, but I believe I was hit with a resurgance of the Plague. Ok it was the flu followed by strep throat, but either way it was no fun.  I am still fighting the awful strep. Not to be too gross, but th e puss pockets in the back of my throat leave an awful taste in my mouth. Not much fun. Still, we have had our good moments too. Snowflake is doing well with her spelling words. She had a Sock Hop to celebrate the 50th day of school and lots of friends are praying for us.  All in all I shouldn't complain. Right now I am wide awake listening to my daughter sleep and it hits me how blessed we are.  We have a warm and cozy house, we are safe and well fed, for all the sickness we are fighting we have doctors and medicine to help.  Lots of blessings indeed. May you see the joy of blessings within the trials and spend this month thanking Abba for all He has done and continues to do for us.

I am far from perfect.  Some might even say I am not very good.  You either like me or you don't. I am ok with that.  I don't need everyone to be my friend. I cancel plans on short notice. I am pretty much a hermit. I don't like parties. I prefer small gatherings. I am not artistic. I am quirky. I don't care about fashion. I need to lose weight. Six years ago I was a pregnant mom in the last trimester. My life had already changed. It was no longer about me. There was a little girl totally dependent upon me and my choices.  Selfishness had to vanish. Snuggles on the couch while reading or watching TV became my new Friday night. Formula went on the shopping list and new books went off.  My needs and wants became secondary to her needs. Four and a half years ago our family of 3 became a team of 2. Pennies are pinched and luxuries became Happy Meals and dolls. I'd much rather see the clutter of toys and coloring books than a living room that would feature on...

Last night as we were praying my Snowflake asked, "Jesus bring me a daddy please?" It is a prayer I have heard often and one that makes me want to weep. She knows and will tell people that God is her Abba, her Father, but my sweet girl longs for a daddy.  She has a great Papa (my Dad) and an adopted Grandpa Gary. There are great male role models in her life, but she wants a dad. That is something I haven't been able to provide for her.  I was almost engaged earlier but I realized that I was doing it for the wrong reasons and with the wrong man. She will only get her deepest prayer if it is for the right reasons: 1. He loves Jesus 2. He loves me and Snowflake 3. God gives me peace.  With everything we have been through I have to approach this with my eyes wide open. I want to find my mate.  I loved being married. Marriage is a great institution, but I will be careful and my husband will be a man of God.  It will be a good union.  So, Snowflake will h...

Parenting is not for the lazy or those in it just for the Hallmark moments.  Parenting is a full time gig.  It is messy and it is difficult. It doesn't matter if you are married to the other parent, divorced and doing the step-parent life our rocking the single parent life. We should all want what is best for our children and that means there will be times when it is hard.  There will be nights when you want to sneak out and escape because the stress of raising children to serve our Lord is hard! Take heart! Even if you are a single parent with the other one totally out of the picture you can do this.  You will mess up and yell, make the wrong choice and feel like you blew it! Forgive yourself, seek the Lord for wisdom and vent to a friend.  Then, move on. You are never alone.  You have Abba helping you. He forgives your parenting blunders.  Give yourself a break and Kit Kat and go back to loving your kids. (This is mostly a pep talk for myself...

I have been struggling lately.  I have a severe case of writer's block.  My 2nd book is stalling. I know where I want to go with it and what I want to say, but I am not sure how to say it. So, I just stare at the screen till I get a better offer. Today's better offer was snow! Why stare blankly at a screen when you can watch snow falling? My Snowflake has a bit of a cold, so we only played outside for a few minutes (& there was only 1 inch of snow). It was fun though.  Great to get out and giggle with my girl. Joy comes when you choose to the make each moment count, when you live in the present and watch a child just light up over the small things. The wonder and thrill of snow still excites my almost 6 year old (almost as much as it does me).  Joy comes when I stop what is causing stress and see life through my daughter's eyes.

With the death of my great aunt, a gal at church and the time of the year I can't hemp but reminisce. Death sucks.  Grieving sucks.  Moving on sucks.  Mourning headaches (the ones you get from crying) sucks. I miss both of my grandmothers, but my Mom's mom is the death I struggle with so much.  Maybe because I relate to her. We both love history, especially family history.  We both have a strong affinity for America.  We have both been betrayed by our respective spouses. The last almost 5 years I have needed her wisdom, advice and hugs. I know that even though she resides in Heaven now I still have her love.  That will never change.  Still, I wish I could have 1 more hour with her.  Just 1. Just 60 minutes to hug her and listen to her wisdom. Today I am really missing her.  Missing her is tough. She was special to do many, friendly, gracious and loving.  To me she was just Grandma. So as I miss her and grieve anew for al...

Well we are not starting November the way I would prefer.  My Snowflake has a cold or some kind of bug. It is a stay home and sleep day for her.  Hopefully a clean and de-clutter day for me! Today is her first sick day and she was not excited at all. Snowflake loves school. She thinks it should be 6 days a week. She is like her mother. I loved school. Active learning about anything was my hobby. To have to miss a day was a bummer. Necessary though. As someone with a very compromised immune system, with a body that attacks itself and not the yuckies I know the value of rest and listening to my body.  We can read books and do a worksheet. We can learn at home. We were able to visit a couple of houses for trick ir treats last night and fill the memory bank. She made a very cute ballerina/Pinkie Pie.